I am weak, and useless. But I'll stay by your side. I'll protect you

Naïve. That four letter word. The one that feels dirty in my mouth, gives me that rotten taste as I sound it out. That sour, vile taste that lingers even after the final syllable has left my lips.

I understand now that reason for the sleazy hotels. Understand why it is there that payers choose to take sellers. There, squalor is propagated by the walls, the floors, the doors, the windows, the very air. Every atom is filthy. There, being disgusting and wretched, John can feel quite at home, perhaps even encouraged. There, he isn't pestered by a nagging feeling that he is ruining something, disturbing some kind of peace. A depraved sense of security, as if he is just in Rome. Doing something natural and not reprehensible in any way.