Today I am not a false conscience

Just who do you think you are are? No, really. We find ourselves yet again coming up on another full cycle around the sun, and we have dutifully survived more than thirty of these revolutions since the days of our birth. This is the ripest time for reflection, is it not? As I think back, I remember how (ten years ago) you asked me where I saw myself in ten years. And, well — here we are — so who are we?

Poor form on your part, asking something me something so tired and clichéd in the first place; with all your supposed intellect and imagination, you would think that you could have come up with something better than the world's most common interview question... though, to be fair, you did preface it with: cheesy as this may sound. Nevertheless... it should come as no surprise to you that I could not muster much of an answer.

I'm gonna go sleep while you craft a response that doesn't completely expose you

Given all the time in the world to craft it, I never could have imagined being here — Penn's woods, my bastion of salvation after this battle of attrition had reached a point so dire that I was just one more bad day away from crushing defeat... in fact, my exact words at the time were: one parking ticket away from swallowing the business end of a shotgun and painting “fin” with my brain matter as it splattered against the rear window of my SUV. Semantics, really.

But I think that if I could have somehow found a way to cobble enough aspirations together to envision a future version of myself back in 2010, it would have at least roughly resembled the one I saw in the mirror this morning. Does your reflection match your vision from all those years ago? Come to think of it, you never gave a response to your own query, so now let me turn the tables on you — where do you see yourself in ten years?

Buckle down for once and answer